I’m not judging people, I’m judging their actions.
It’s the same type of distinction that I try to apply to myself, to judge, but not be judgmental.
Hey y’all. Did you miss me? For those of you who noticed I was silent last week, my apologies for the unexpected hiatus. If you didn’t notice, that’s fine too. I have not yet achieved the position where I take myself so seriously.
To save space, I won’t get into the eleventy billion things going on in my little corner of the world. I will say that this column is written nearly real time. And by the time I realized it needed to be written, it was really too late. And honestly, it wasn’t something I really wanted to make time for. So I made the choice.
I felt a bit guilty about that. Moreover, I got a bit nervous about what folks would think. I don’t know about you, but I can recall in full living color almost every mistake, misstep, small fault, discrepancy, deficiency, perceived or otherwise, that I have ever had. I assume that every one else does too. Ridiculous as it sounds, any moment that I fall short creates a whirlwind of judgement calling up every past moment where I wasn’t quite enough. It’s a fun time. Really.
I have made a conscience decision to alter that natural response. It is not the easiest thing I have ever done and it takes a fair amount of effort and intention. However, a big bonus is the effect it has on my ability to deal with people. Because I have learned so much about being kinder to myself and the truth about perception and reality, it is far easier to extend the same latitude to others around me.
Today, I encourage you to tell the witch voice in your head to take a hike. This nag is useless. We are all imperfect people. We all make mistakes. Sometimes we are fortunate to do them in private. Sometimes the whole world is watching. Either way, we aren’t the first person to screw it up. And outside of ourselves and folks who are just looking for a reason to pull you down, no one really remembers all that other stuff anyway – they are too busy remembering their own. Understand the nag will return. That voice is kinda persistent that way. It is not another statement of failure, but another chance to exercise strength. These tough moments are not evidence of failed person, but of the humanity that makes us resilient.
Thanks for the coffee,
*Photo Credit to Tim Hyde